The breakout session that I attended at the Austin Stone Summer Conference was helpful for me, a novice in the art of discipleship.  I thought the panel gave some great practical advice for what these relationships look like.  

Here are some take-aways that I had that might be beneficial to others just diving into the world of discipleship:

Choosing Who to Disciple

Pray.  Keep an eye out for people that you see serving in the Body – and be looking for a person who is faithful in what they are doing.  Whether they are doing set-up/tear down or teaching a small group or caring for kiddos – look for those who are being faithful in what the Lord has currently entrusted to them.  The panelists reported that sometimes they chose people to disciple and, other times, people approached them and asked if they would disciple them.

Starting the Relationship

Set expectations.  What is the weekly time commitment?  What does the person being discipled expect to learn?  Does this fit your gifts and roles?  Set an end date – whether it’s a semester, a year, whatever – have a fixed time period and evaluate whether or not to continue once that point is reached.  This provides an “out” if either party is ready to move on.

Numbers

Often discipleship relationships can be one-on-one, but one of the panelists suggested trying discipleship in groups.  Not only does valuable learning occur between the leader and the disciples, but also amongst the disciples – and often lasting friendships as well.

The First Conversation

One panelist uses five Hs to get to know the person during the first meeting:

• Heritage – What type of family did you come from?  What was your home like?
• Heroes – Who do you look up to?  Who do you want to be like?
• Heartaches – What difficult things have happened in your life?
• Highlights – What amazing things have happened in your life?
• Hopes – What do you hope to do/be/etc.?

Breadth of the Relationship

One panelist said that the discipling relationship is not just limited to teaching another person Scripture – but includes getting into the person’s life, helping set a firm theological foundation, and also encouraging daily spiritual disciplines.  The panelists mentioned things like inviting them over to dinner, allowing them to see you in your messy times and even having a person come and live in your home (probably ideal if you’re a mom and there are college students nearby.)

How to Close a Relationship

When you reach the designated endpoint of the discipleship relationship – the facilitator encouraged having almost a “graduation” ceremony.  Look the disciple(s) in the eyes and charge them to go out and not only not waste their lives, but not waste yours since you have now spent significant time investing in them.  Another person stated that it may be helpful to give the disciple a tangible means of remembering what they have learned and going forth to use it.

Obviously these aren’t the only ways to disciple and these tips may not apply to everyone – but hopefully they provide a jumping off point to thinking about discipleship.